Tag Archives: Running Progress

Getting Back Out On The Road Again.

Copy of I Never Want To Run A Marathon... And That’s Okay (4)

Happy Sunday all! It’s been a little while since I’ve been blogging, it’s definitely been a busy few months for all the right reasons and while we’re currently (at the time of writing) in a crisis of the Coronavirus, I wanted to talk about something I’ve been working on recently to distract myself and that’s getting back into running (again!) and if you haven’t read my “2020: The Year of Running?” I’d recommend reading that first.

Towards the very very end of the year last year, I was on a roll with the running and on New Year’s Day, Scott and I went out for a lovely run to one of our local parks and it was great. I didn’t care about the time at this point, we were just glad to be out for a run. However… that’s where it stopped for a while. That’s the thing about the dark mornings and the dark evenings; you might be the type of person who can get motivated during these times but for me, it’s a time that can get me quite down especially after a day of work and I couldn’t think of anything less appealing than going to the gym or out for a run. (However, I love going to the gym, but getting myself out for a run was much harder)

So initially, I was training for the Craic 10K race that takes place on St. Patrick’s Day every year in Belfast. However, due to the Coronavirus, many races like these have been cancelled or postponed until a later date. It wasn’t something that shocked me because of course, it’s the right thing to do but I was aware that there was a high possibility of this happening. 

The next postponed date in June gives me quite a lot of time to improve my timings which I think will give me an aim for the next few months. I’m 100% confident that I can run the distance because I’ve done it before (and if I wasn’t confident, I know that would be about the mindset rather than the physical challenge).

For the meantime, we have no other races booked because we don’t know what position the country will be in over the next few weeks or next few months.

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I’ve started running on the treadmill more recently than I ever have before. I tend to get bored on the treadmill but I find that I get intimidated by outside sometimes; I would make excuses to run with Scott but in all honesty, I was worried about not being able to run the length of myself. While I was trying to get out of my own head, I found the treadmill in the gym really helpful because even though I wasn’t going a full 5K distance, I was still pushing myself and working out my perfect pace, so I was still doing the work. 

Our most recent run went really well in fact; we ran 8K (or five mile) altogether and only stopped twice. Scott and I normally walk for about ten minutes or so before we start our run, to give our bodies time to warm up, we’ve found it’s a perfect warm up tactic for us. 

It started off at a slower pace but we had talked about not worrying about the time, the distance was more important. You have to choose one or the other when you’re getting back into running, so, because we were originally preparing for the 10K race, that’s why we choose distance. I was really surprised how clear my head was; if you’ve read previous blog posts of mine, you’ll know that mindset is a huge barrier for me and if I’m not in the mood to workout, I CAN NOT push it.

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We ran down one of our favourite routes that goes towards the water and we were absolutely fine until we got to the park where the beach is partially exposed. That’s when we discovered that some families have no consideration for anyone but themselves. As a runner, walker and cyclist, I’m very aware that we all need to be aware of our surroundings. I let others runners run past me, if a cyclist is behind me and I don’t realise until late, I instantly move out of the way. If there is a large family, I try my best to give them room but I get frustrated when a family take up an entire path and I believe that’s where my limit ends. It ended up putting me off my run a little and it was frustrating. I know now that we need to take another part of the route next time to make sure that doesn’t happen again but if we’re all more aware of our surroundings, then it will make everyone’s journey a much happier place. (Rant over right?)

Apart from that one issue, I was happy with the run. We did over the 5K distance that I wanted to do, my breathing was fine throughout the majority of it and I was so pleased that my head let me go further than I originally thought. Our time was 1 hour and 5 minutes and while I wasn’t concentrating on time, it’s hard not to reflect back on what you used to do. 

IMG-20180902-WA0010-01.jpeg(Our old race numbers from a few years ago!)

I was talking to someone about this on Instagram this week about my mindset when it comes to running. It’s hard not to reflect on what you used to do; my fastest 10K was 1 hour and 4 minutes so for a 8K to have a slower time, it can have an effect on me but I’ve found it really important to be present in my runs and I know the more I run, the faster I will be. That’s how I originally became faster; my first ever 5K was 40 minutes and it got down to 30 minutes and 2 seconds and all that was because of hard work and consistency. I also have to think about where I was in my life at that point, I wasn’t particular happy in my job at that point and I used it as a distraction, whereas now I’m very happy with so many elements in my life that part of me doesn’t mind that I’m slower, because I’m now a lot happier.

I’m currently working on what my running goals are going to be, now that I’m getting back out there more often. Whether I will post them on the blog publicly, I haven’t decided yet. Thank you so much as always for reading today’s post and if you have any tips or advice surrounding this, you can let me know over on my usual Twitter and Instagram social channels. Have a great week! 🌻

2020: The Year Of Running?

Copy of I Never Want To Run A Marathon... And That’s Okay (1)

Aah running, it’s always been such a balancing act for me; I love it because I can see instant progress but I hate the way it makes me feel sometimes. Thankfully I don’t get too much of the latter anymore. Today’s post however is talking about my first run back a few weeks ago, how I felt and what changes I’ll be making to move forward with my running goals.

In a previous post about how last year (2019) wasn’t my best year of running (which I’ll link here) I talked all about why I thought it wasn’t the best year in terms of my running and what went wrong. I had an incredible 2019 for the most part but it was just that my fitness wasn’t at its best like it should have been.
Getting ready for that first run again was tough, not in the sense that I had no idea what to expect but I was worried that I wouldn’t be able to run at all. I didn’t know whether I could run 100m never mind one mile, and I had been putting it off for a couple of weeks. Scott would suggest that we go for a run, and I would quickly suggest the gym instead, but I always knew in the back of my mind that running was more important to him, and I felt bad. I felt bad that I was more than likely, holding him back from doing what he loved, because I couldn’t get past my worry.

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Starting that first run back was better than expected; I was able to run 5K without stopping and I didn’t think I would be able to do that for at least the first few runs. I was incredibly proud of myself because I had been so worried for weeks that I would never be able to run again. When you say it out loud, it sounds ridiculous, right? I stopped running on a regular basis and now all of a sudden, I feel like I’m never going to be able to run again.
There are so many quotes about not thinking about the past and living in the present, that this one in particular seems perfect for what I’m trying to explain: “If you want to be happy, do not dwell in the past, do not worry about the future, focus on living fully in the present.” Thinking about how you used to be (especially when you were at your best) can be emotional at times and it can actually put you off pursuing something (like I did for quite a few weeks).
In anything, when you have built a skill and you feel like you have to start over again, it can be difficult. You never know if you’re going to get back to that stage again and it can be even harder going back to square one and doing all the leg work. For me, it was all about speed; when I first began running, I was at a 45 minute 5K and then my best was 30:02 (yes, two seconds off 30 minutes!) and now I’m at around 38 minutes. Sure, it’s not forty five but it’s not close to my absolute best. I would say that was the hardest part of getting back into a running routine again; knowing that I wasn’t going to be as fast and having to deal with that, whether I was okay with it or not.. When you haven’t ran consistently in just under a year, what can you really expect? It’s like anything really; if you learn a language for a year and then stop for nine months, it’s going to take a while to get back into again.

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I can tell you about how I felt getting back into running again and how I’m not happy with having to start very close to the beginning again, but what changes do I need to make? Am I going to make running a priority again? Am I going to make a plan?
As I mentioned in one of my previous posts about how to start budgeting (which you can read right here), I talked about having a “why” and while we’re not talking about money in this post today, the subject is still relatable. It’s important to have a “why” and especially for your goals (whatever they may be) because if you don’t, you’ll simply be less motivated to move forward with them and failure will be more likely. In order to make something a priority, you need to assess your time, your why and where you would like to move further with it in the future.
For me, running and overall physical fitness is a priority for me, so it’s important to me to make sure I look at what time I do have and when I can fit my goals into my time. I work a normal 9-5 schedule which I absolutely love, but I get tired very easily. I don’t have a chronic disease and having someone close to me that has one, I can only imagine what someone goes through with that type of illness. I have always had a sense of tiredness since my early teenage years and it’s always something that has stayed with me. Having no solution can be difficult but I know that so many other people have it worse than me, and it’s something I do have to remember.
I know that scheduling two runs during the week and a slightly longer run at the weekend will be the starting point for Scott and I, and we may substitute a run for a gym session but it’s equally as important to improve our overall fitness and not just our cardiovascular health. We’re also planning on signing up to a few races over the year too, because then that will help us aim for slightly larger goals, whether that is distance or speed.

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As always, thank you for taking the time to read today’s post and if you have anything similar that you think would make an interesting read, you can leave it down below in the comments, over on my Twitter or my Instagram. Have a lovely week!

2019 Wasn’t My Running Year But That’s Okay.

Copy of I Never Want To Run A Marathon... And That’s Okay

It’s safe to say that sometimes we’re not always on our game; whether that’s for a day, a few weeks, a few months or even a year and that’s how I have felt this year with running. I want to deep dive today into why I think that is and why ultimately, it’s okay to have those moments.

I normally try and be pretty honest about my emotions because if you know me in real life, you know it’s very hard for me to hide how I feel. I have resting bitch face that can not be hidden and because I am so sensitive, that often shows itself very fast too. When it comes to most activities, I have to be careful on how I push myself. If you read one of my firsts posts about running (linked here), I talked about feeling horrible before, during and after a run because I wasn’t in the right headspace before and it was actually made worse going out for that run. I’m all for the benefits of exercise and the endorphins, and if that works for you, that’s perfect but for some of us, it doesn’t and that’s okay too. If I stress myself out too much, it tends to affect everything around me including my fitness amongst other things so I’ve learned over time that sometimes when I’m stressed, it’s like a domino effect and one of the first priorities that is affected, is my fitness.

IMG-20171110-WA0005-01.jpeg(My first ever 10K was “dress like you’re going to a wedding” theme and running in tights and a dress was definitely something new!)

Scott and I have dropped out of a number of races this year; one was in Canada and I was devastated over it but it wasn’t a lack of training that stopped us and that’s why I don’t feel terrible about it. I had an accident the day before the day and I had really hurt myself; I described it as belly flopping the ground when I tripped walking across a road. I have never been in so much pain in all my life and it does still affect me to this day so while I hate the fact that I couldn’t run the next day, it would have been impossible.

The other races were simply due to lack of training and not running enough beforehand. We have signed up for one or two 10K’s and one 10 mile race which I actually blogged about (which is linked here) and that one was the biggest disappointment for me. I had built it up in my head but when it came down to it, I didn’t put in the work and I was left with a decision; do I try and run and potentially hurt myself or do I not run, lose the money but understand the reason why I didn’t do it. I made the right decision completely and I’m still gutted that I didn’t do it, but there will always be other races and it’s not something I want to make myself feel guilty about forever.

IMG-20180620-WA0004-01.jpeg(Back when I set my 10K personal best at the Lisburn 10K in 2018)

2018 was such a fantastic running year for me and I couldn’t be prouder of that despite having a few iffy months emotionally so while I really don’t like the fact that I wasn’t as good this year as I was last year, that’s totally okay. If we’re really being honest, it actually gives me the drive to be even better next year. I know that we don’t have to wait until Monday or the start of the month to start our goals but I’m making an exception with this one. Sure, I’m still going to be running the rest of the year as much as I can, but the real work begins in January. I’m working towards the longer distances, my timings are going to be much faster and I’m going to set myself challenges along the way which will be as motivating as they were back in 2018.

Thank you so much for giving this post a few minutes of your time, it really means a lot to me. If you have any related content you’d like to share (because I love reading other’s running experience) please let me know either down in the comments or over on my Instagram or Twitter. Have a great week! 

Taking On My Biggest Challenge Yet: Ten Mile Race.

Taking On My Biggest Challenge Yet_

It’s been a while since I posted about an upcoming race isn’t it? Well, that’s what I’ll be talking about in today’s post and it’s my biggest challenge yet! *cue the sweats* 

If you’ve been a reader of the blog for a while, you’ll know that I have been absolutely in love with running and other times, I’ve found myself at a low point with it. I also talked recently about my running confidence (which I’ll link you to here) so when they tell you that running isn’t linear, it’s one hundred percent true. I’ve been feeling more motivated with my running recently when I set myself a challenge of running twenty miles in June and July, and I smashed that goal. I’m very aware that for a runner, that is a very small goal but what I think is more important is that I start small and work my way up. For example, in August and September, I’m aiming for twenty-five miles. Again, slow but simple steps. 

I realise the irony in that last paragraph when I talk about small steps and taking it easy when I’ve just signed up for a ten-mile race that takes place in less than two months. Yes, two months! To give a little more context; I have ran nine miles twice; both times were last year, once in May and once in October so I know I have the physically capability to do it, but it’s just the mental capability I will need to battle with now. I told myself I needed a challenge; I had wanted to train for a half marathon but not necessarily sign up for one but thirteen miles just seemed far too much for the later stages of this year. When I came across ten miles, I knew that was something that I was going to have to work hard for but in the few months, I knew I could do it. With the motivation I have been getting back recently with running; I knew that if I kept that up while increasing my mileage and building my speed back up again, I would be fine. It’s that initial stage of those first thoughts, “Okay, so how do I get my head in the right space for running this distance?” 

2217.-ARMAGH-ROADRACE-2019-APPLICATION-FORM-WEB-1.png(Photo Credit: ABC Council)

The race itself is the Armagh 10 Mile and 4 Mile Fun Run challenge that takes place on Sunday 13th October that starts and finishes at the Navan Centre in Armagh. It’s actually the 20th anniversary of this race this year so I’m sure it’ll be exciting to be a part of that celebration as a whole. I’ll be running it with Scott as always, so I’ll have company with me if I hit a mental block (but fingers crossed I won’t, with the right training). If you fancy reading more about it (and potentially signing up to it) I’ll leave it linked here. 

My plan is over the next few weeks to keep the blog updated with my training runs, how I’m feeling, about the highs and lows, and the overall build up to the race. I’m genuinely so nervous so if you have any tips or advice for me, I’d absolutely love to hear them either down below in the comments, over on my Twitter or on my Instagram. Thank you so much for reading, I really do appreciate it! 

Is Tracking Every Single Run Important?

As a runner, I’m always looking to progress with my personal bests, whether that is in time or in distance but what happens when it starts to consume you. How important is your timing when you run and should we always be tracking our runs? That’s what I’ll be discussing in today’s post. 

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Before I begin, I have to say I am all for looking at your times during and after your run. I wrote a post recently about “Why I’m No Long Counting My Steps” and if you read that post, you’ll know that not hitting my steps made me feel bad about myself despite the fact that I am an active person, but not hitting those steps put a dampener on that. That started to happen when I started tracking my runs too but because I wanted to progress, I knew that I couldn’t simply stop tracking them. 

When I first started running, I was very focused on simply running because I didn’t have a lot of experience with before and it wasn’t as easy as “just running”. It took a lot of mental and physical energy out of me, much more than I was ever expecting so I was happy enough for a while pushing myself. Once I realised that I could run 5K, that’s when I started to look at the numbers more in depth. If I didn’t get to the same time as last time, and if I wasn’t faster, I became disappointed despite feeling like it was a great run. I became obsessed with being better and while I believe it is important to do better yourself, I think you know yourself when you’ve pushed it too far. 

IMG-20180908-WA0013-01.jpeg(Scott and I at our most recent race, the Larne 10K)

When I didn’t get a “good time” by my own standards, I started to doubt whether I was a good runner. I wrote a post a few months ago about “Becoming Comfortable With Calling Myself A Runner” and it’s exactly what it says on the tin. I had a big problem with timing and I started to doubt whether I was a runner, if I was getting these “low standards” times and often, it was really hard to deal with. It even made me not want to run because I was scared that I would get another “bad” time, and if I was doing that, then what was the point in running? I’m very competitive with myself and it was so foreign to me just to run with no expectations. I kept asking myself what would that achieve? 

What does your time matter? 

If you’re preparing for a race or you’re hoping to become faster or run further, then one hundred percent I believe you should track your run. Depending on what equipment and application you use, you’ll be able to see your splits and how your body reacted to going up on incline or speeding up down a hill, to name a few examples. Those will be very good lessons on learning how to deal with pacing in the future; I often find that I go up hills too fast and over time with the help of my boyfriend, I’ve learned that going slower up hills may not be ideal for time but my body can cope with running longer if I have gone slower during the hard part. 

When does your time not matter? 

Your time doesn’t matter if you’re just running to run. Simple as, if you’re using it as another form of exercise or you’re looking for something to get you outside, then I really don’t believe time should be your biggest worry. 

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(For reference, I use Strava for my running. It’s great with working out my splits and I find it to be accurate most of the time. Ever since I downloaded the app almost a year ago, it’s only not connected up twice which was frustrating at the time, but for a free app, it’s not too bad. You can get a premium version too, it comes with some great features though.) 

Running has become a very lovable hobby and I can see why many runners say it is a love hate relationship; you love it when it’s over but during it when you feel like you mentally can’t go on, you hate it. It’s something that does get easier thankfully but we still have our bad days as well as our good days.  

Looking back at how I used to think shows me how far I have come in terms of my mindset because no matter what time you get, you are still a runner and you shouldn’t be discouraged by your time. It still happens to me and you’ll probably find it happens to every runner, I find that it doesn’t affect me as much as when I first began. 

Thank you so much for reading today’s post. I’d be really interested in hearing from other runners if they have been through this dilemma before and how they have worked through it so if you have any links, send them through to me over on my Twitter or my Instagram. 

Larne 10K Race (2018).

Another day, another race write-up. Today’s post is all about the Larne 10K which took place on Saturday 8th September 2018. 

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I was much more nervous about this event than the previous Laganside race; simply because I didn’t know the course. In all fairness, I didn’t even know Larne so seeing the route, I wasn’t too sure if there were any hills or how it would look when I was there. However, because my previous race had gone so well, I wasn’t too worried about not being able to run as well as I had done then. That was until I went out on a run a few days before the race… 

My training had been downhill this particular week. I had planned a 6.5K run mid-way through the week but I only managed to run 2K before giving up. I know that now I can look back and reflect to tell myself that a run is better than no run, but when you are training for a race, it’s very hard to tell yourself that. The build-up to the race had had a dampener put on it because of this. 

It was quite a nice race to attend for a number of different reasons; we got to head up on the train to somewhere I had never explored before. Being so used to getting the bus, I do love the train sometimes. I was also excited to run another 10K because even though my training hadn’t been the greatest lately, I wasn’t letting myself down in terms of times so I was happy to improve that and possibly add more routes to my belt too. 

The route started off with my favourite method, downhill! This can cause some trouble especially if you feel like you’re going too fast at the beginning but I had Scott to keep me right and I asked him a few times and he said I was going fine. We then went through the town centre and there were tons of supporters from consumers to even some shop owners, which I thought was really nice. Once we got out of the town, we headed down to the coast and I never realised how pretty it is there and it’s one of the main reasons I would love to head back again. At around this point on the first lap, Scott started to get a pain in his calf so he told me to run on. It turns out that I might have went too fast because he said as soon as I left, I passed quite a few people so I probably got too excited. I then turned a corner and seen a hill, and it wasn’t just any hill, it was quite a steep hill. I wouldn’t have been so annoyed but Scott had told me it was a flat course from what he thought. Part of me thought that he pulled back from me because he knew how annoyed I would be, but it turns out, he did actually hurt his calf. I was able to run up the hill almost to the three quarter point, but it was a slow run. The second time going up the hill was really a run-walk-run because it had exhausted me.  

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I started to tire out at the 5K mark and I felt really disappointed in myself. I had to stop more in the second lap to walk and while it wasn’t all the time, it was more than two or three times. I try and not walk in a race but I think it’s something I need to come to terms with that I will do it at some point. At the mid-way mark, I was convinced that I was going to get a bad time, I didn’t think I would get close to my best time, especially with the hill. I wasn’t aiming for a personal best, I never do but I was disappointed that I felt like I had done so badly. As with any race, I seen the finishing line but it was a while before I could really power through so I was about 100m away and I bolted. I had loaded up my Strava before the finish so I could click the stop button as soon as I was done. When I crossed the line, I looked at my Strava and it said 01:06:23 and I was in shock. I would have expected one hour and ten minutes so I was over the moon because I really pushed for it. As it turns out, it’s my second best 10K time which made the experience even better. 

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I would one hundred percent compete in this race again; it was such a fantastic atmosphere and it was pretty rare that you didn’t have someone shouting support, which was really nice especially when you were struggling. I’m glad that I know about the hill now because I think my pacing would be better the second time around; I know now where to push and where to pull back. It was very well organised race too, and it was clear from the get-go that it was. The starting and finishing line were very apparent, it started pretty dead-on time too and there was a great turn out.  

Thank you so much for reading today’s post! I know that race write-ups aren’t everyone’s cup of tea and that’s perfectly fine but I like that I now have a written history of each one to let me know how I’m progressing each and every time.  

Laganside 10K Race (2018).

Running has become a huge part of my life so it’s always a joy to write about my recent races. Today is no different as I write up about the Laganside 10K that took place at Ormeau Park on Sunday 2nd September.

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(The only reason we look so fresh is because this was taken before the race.)
I have attended the Laganside 10K twice so far; last year as a supporter for Scott and this year as a runner myself. It was quite nice to take part this time because it always seemed like a nice course but I never took advantage of how runner friendly it was, until now. The Ormeau Embankment is one of my favourite routes to cycle on, simply because it’s a nice route, it’s by the water and it is very cycle friendly with enough room for walkers, runners and cyclists. Some towpaths can get very narrow but this one ticks most of the boxes for me.

In terms of training I had done leading up to the run, that was still ongoing from the Connswater 10K (which I decided not to write about this time around because I had so many issues with it, that it simply wasn’t worth it) which was only a few weeks ago so my training just continued. I was only averaging one run a week which wasn’t ideal but it was still something and because I was pushing myself on each run, that’s why I didn’t feel terrible for not getting out more.

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(I was a little worried that people were going to think that the “Michael Scott’s Dunder-Mifflin Scranton Meredith Palmer Memorial Celebrity Rabies Awareness Fun Run Race For The Cure” was a real charity. I hope some people got the reference.)
For the first time possibly ever, I wasn’t nervous about the race. Part of me believes that I wasn’t nervous because I knew the route; I hadn’t ran it before this, but because I already knew exactly where I was going to go, I didn’t face that challenge. It was a really nice feeling because I’m not too fond of the butterflies before a race. I only had one objective for this race and it was to beat my Titanic Quarter time of 01:07:35 because it’s a really good bench mark in order for me to improve.

If you know Belfast City Centre, you’ll know exactly where this route is. You start in Ormeau Park, coming down onto the Ravenhill Road, down towards Lanyon Place train station and onto the short cut of the Ormeau Embankment, turning on the bridge on the Ormeau Road and back down the other side of the embankment. The only difference on the second lap is that you enter Ormeau Park at the very end rather than at the start again. On the course, you really only have two hills to go up and one of them is barely a hill so it’s been the easiest course for me.

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(We stayed close to the back at the start of the race rather than being bunched up in the crowd.)
Scott and I ran together again which is always quite nice, considering he started me off with my running. I use him as my pacer so he often tells me when I’m going too fast and to slow it down a little. I still view myself as a beginner runner so I’m not too sure when I am going at the right pace so it’s nice to have someone pull me back. Unfortunately, this time I wasn’t really picking up the signals and I was going faster than I should have been. It wasn’t until after the race that Scott told me that I was going too fast but he didn’t want to hold me back especially if I felt comfortable. I think you just get caught up in it with all the other runners so you start off going faster because you feel the need to catch up with everyone else. Scott let me run on at around the two-mile mark and I always feel bad when he tells me to run on but he started to get a stitch so the best thing for those are to just slow down.

I felt comfortable for the majority of the race and I seemed to run with the same people throughout it as well which was nice because you almost felt like they were your pacers. I didn’t hit a mental block until around 8K and for most of my 10K’s recently, that seems to be the marker for me. I’m not completely sure why but I still kept going and had to whisper to myself that “I could do this” and it did work. (The magic of words, eh?) Of course, when I seen that finishing line, I bolted and I must have passed about ten people at that point. I seem to get this block of energy out of nowhere and my legs just pick up.

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(The map of the route as shown by my Strava.)
My time for this race from my Strava was 01:07:36 but the chip time was 01:07:34, one second faster than my Titanic Quarter 10K, so I did get a better time, but by one second! I was completely over the moon with my time because I pushed myself and surprisingly I didn’t stop to walk at all in this race. For the last couple of races, I have had to stop and walk which there is nothing wrong with but it’s always an aim of mine for any 5K or 10K, not to stop. I know when I start to train for longer distances, I will have to stop for a break but that’s nothing that I worry about because I know it’s completely natural based on how you feel that day and more importantly, if your body is coping with the distance.

This particular race has been one of my favourites and I would one hundred percent, sign up again next year. It was capped at 1,500 people and it was such a well organised event so I really can’t praise it enough.

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(Here we are with our medals!)

Thank you so much for reading today’s post, I love writing these post-run write ups after a race that I have enjoyed, because you give yourself time to reflect and how you can improve next time.