As I put this post live, I have recently handed in my thirty day notice to my rented house as I begin to move in with my boyfriend. That’s what today’s post is about; why we decided to do it and what some of the biggest changes will be.
My boyfriend and I have been together for over two and a half years now, but even from the first year, we’ve talked quite fondly about moving in together. I met him three months after I moved into my own place so I knew I wanted to take my time and not rush the process because I wasn’t ready. I had never had my own place before so I wanted to absorb it all and be on my own, and by doing that, I would know when the right time was. We had actually originally discussed not moving in together until we were engaged but as we got further on in our relationship, it became apparent that none of us wanted to wait that long.
We do live quite close to each other and because we spend so much time together, it made sense. While it’s not the sole reason, one of our main reasons is financial; it’s pretty clear that when two people move in together, you will save a lot of money and because we’re always wanting to save for a new holiday or to fix another room in the house up, it makes sense to put that money towards something beneficial for us rather than me spending double the amount on my rent and bills. Of course, the main reason we wanted to do this is because we love each other and we wanted to take the next step in our relationship. (Yes, okay, please puke because it’s so cute!) It hasn’t been without a small population of people warning us about “really getting to know each other” when we’re under each others feet, and while I understand their point, I’m excited for the next step (even if it means slightly more arguments than usual, because what’s a relationship without a disagreement or two, right?).
A lot of people tend to look at the challenges when something like this, but we tend to try and find out what we need to focus on or what the biggest changes will be because as much as we’ve heard the normal challenges (Ie. moving boxes back and forth), we’re looking at it from a positive angle to set the precedent for the future:
Doing separate activities and having date nights.
I believe it’s important for any relationship to be comfortable around each other to watch TV in silence or for one to read a book while the other plays a game but sometimes you can get a little too used to that. We all need time on our own, whether that’s simply alone time or time to spend on a hobby. For example, I love blogging and I tend to write my best work in one of my favourite coffee shops so I normally pop over there for a few hours on my own; whereas Scott writes reviews for a film review website so he normally likes to be on his own in the living room for that while watching the film on screen. I go to Girl Guides on a Thursday and he has a second job of doing merchandising so we do have our own separate activities to make sure we’re not living on top of each other.
What we also have to keep in mind is that we make time to go out on dates; I think because couples in long-term relationships are so used to each other’s company, especially if they live together; they tend not to go out as often and our thinking behind it, is that we know we won’t be able to do it as much when we have children, so we’re taking advantage now. It doesn’t have to be anything extravagant or over-the-top but it could be a dinner and a movie night, a new sports activity that we haven’t tried yet or even seeing a comedy gig together. Because we’ll be saving money, we’ll have a little extra to splash on dates and we think it’s going to be a good opportunity to snap up while we can.
Helping Audrey adapt to her new surroundings.
This will be a quite a big challenge for my little Audrey and I’m hoping she adapts well to it all; she’ll have more places to explore, and I’m hoping that because she’ll be able to explore the house more, she won’t scratch furniture as much. She’ll get more attention in the evenings too and Scott can’t wait to share the house with her because he genuinely loves her.
Observing and improving our morning routines.
As the months have passed, I haven’t been on top of my mornings as I should be. There are days when Scott will have slept in and vice-versa so we know that when the move does happen, we’ll adjust to when we both need to get up; whether that is for the gym, a run, a morning meal prep or simply for work. It might take a few days or even a few weeks but once we get into the rhythm of it, we’ll be pretty set, you know? Hopefully with the adjustment, we’ll be able to grasp better routines along the way too.
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Of course, there will be the usual things that moving boxes and furniture to his house, trying to find a place for everything, dumping or donating anything I don’t need or want any more, and changing my address over for EVERYTHING but the three things above are something I want to truly focus on. The packing is important but it’s happening no matter what, the changing addresses will happen over time once I get a change but making sure Audrey is okay in her new environment and making sure Scott and I keep our relationship fresh, are two things that are vital to keeping our home happy. The morning routines, like I said, will happen over time but that’s the power of motivation, will power and awareness over the first few weeks.
Thank you so much for reading today’s post! I didn’t want to necessarily write an advice piece because this is new to me so it’s more of an update. If you have any posts that you think would be relevant to what I have talked about today, please let me know either below in the comments, on my Twitter or on my Instagram.